The Best Way to Change Your Fortune: Don’t Respond, Don’t Absorb Negative Energy

Have you ever calculated how much energy is consumed in the process of internal friction when you argue with others, get pulled into an emotional whirlpool by a malicious comment, or repeatedly chew over someone’s disparaging words?

In today’s information-overloaded era, each of us is actually trapped in a hidden war—the battle for attention. My solution is “don’t respond, don’t absorb negative energy.” This is not avoidance, but rather a strategic conservation of energy.

Why Do We Always Get “Hooked”?

First, we need to understand the neural mechanism of emotional hijacking. When negative information strikes, the brain instantly activates a three-level alert system:

1. The amygdala ignites emotional flames (instinct: anger/fear/sadness, etc.)
2. The prefrontal cortex is forced offline (rational paralysis)
3. The body enters combat readiness (accelerated heartbeat/muscle tension)

This response system is actually embedded in human genes. In the harsh survival environment of primitive society, it helped us avoid ferocious beasts. But in modern society, the real threats have changed.

The greatest consumption is not physical strength, but mental energy. Every time you respond forcefully, repeatedly ruminate, or lose sleep over something, you’re using your most precious mental energy to feed people and things that aren’t worth it.

Each emotional hijacking takes about an hour for cortisol levels to return to normal—meaning one unnecessary absorption of negative energy is enough to ruin your entire morning of deep work.

Neuroscientists have also discovered that when the brain processes negative information, it activates the same areas associated with physical pain.

A true strong person doesn’t need to repel all attacks, but rather makes attacks unable to penetrate your energy armor.

As stated in “Meditations”: “External arrows shot at you only truly pierce you when you reach out to catch them.”

Building Your Energy Shield

I. Physical Defense

Digital Screening: Turn off unnecessary notifications and set “phone-free time periods.” For example, Dong Qing has a habit of not bringing her phone into the bedroom.

Beware of the “information sunflower seed effect”—what does this mean? Think about your state when scrolling through short videos; doesn’t it feel like cracking sunflower seeds, one after another for that instant gratification?

Physical Isolation Trinity:

1. Noise-canceling headphones (block environmental noise). When my surroundings are noisy, I put on noise-canceling headphones to physically block out the noise.
2. An environment conducive to flow state. When I write on weekends, I stay in my study, draw the curtains, brew a cup of tea, and focus on work.
3. Pre-set exit scripts: When encountering people or situations that “entangle” you, think ahead about how to escape, such as: “I need to handle an urgent matter, let’s talk later…”

Never challenge your willpower, just as you should never challenge human nature. Experiments prove that everyone has limited willpower each day—use some, lose some. So try not to do things that require willpower to overcome.

To achieve results, create an environment that makes it easy to focus.

II. Installing Cognitive “Firewall”

Psychologist Viktor Frankl said: “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

When encountering people or things unfavorable to you, ask yourself three questions:

• Will this matter still be important a year from now?
• Is the other party’s intention constructive or destructive?
• Will my response change the substance or just consume myself?

General Colin Powell once said: “Don’t let other people’s problems become your problems.”

The real battlefield is in your goals, not in others’ words. Invest your energy in controllable areas: your actions, your growth, the relationships you cherish.

When negative emotions from others attack, be aware: How much of what they’re stating is verifiable fact? How much is just their emotional venting? What negative emotions are they trying to trigger in me, or what negative emotions have they unconsciously triggered?

Be aware of your emotions and achieve non-absorption.

There’s a saying: “He who fights monsters should be careful lest he thereby become a monster.”

Your battlefield is where you create value, not in emotional quagmires.

III. Reclaiming Your Energy

When anger strikes, don’t rush to engage. Activate your psychological defenses:

1. Physical Isolation (Golden 10 Seconds): When feeling provoked, immediately count to 10 in your mind, take deep breaths, interrupt the emotional reflex arc, and regain control of your emotions. Leave the scene, go to the bathroom, or do a specific small task like sweeping, making peace with current emotions.

2. Perspective Switching (God’s Eye View): Imagine if you were to fight back, if you were to get entangled with them—would it help achieve our goals? Would it solve the problem? Would it improve the relationship? Activate a third-person perspective: What does their words reflect about their mindset? Why are they like this?

3. Meaning Reconstruction (Growth Mindset): This kind of emotional control exercises my composure, cultivates my character, and improves my emotional management abilities.

In my interactions with my daughter, I often use this method to make peace with current emotions, then think about how I should accept the situation and find an appropriate time and emotional state to explore and solve problems together with her.

True Freedom

True freedom is not doing whatever you want, but being able to decide what can enter your spiritual world.

From this moment on, engrave “don’t respond, don’t absorb negative energy” in your mind:

• When pointless arguments arise, leave quickly: “My time is valuable, you’re not worth my energy consumption.”
• When encountering malicious comments, delete immediately: “Garbage information doesn’t deserve to occupy any of my memory.”
• When energy vampires approach, immediately find an excuse to leave: “I have something urgent to handle.”

“The Power of Now” reveals: Pain comes from resistance to the present moment. Repeatedly responding to and absorbing negative events is the deepest form of resistance.

In this era of information overload and emotional flooding, “don’t respond, don’t absorb negative energy” has become advanced survival wisdom. It’s not cold indifference, but respect for your own energy and efficient allocation of it.

Let’s encourage each other on this journey.